OPINION: Parasocial relationships are a toxic part of internet culture 

Just because you follow someone doesn’t mean you know them.

Courtesy Pexels

With the rise of social media, we have also seen a rise in parasocial relationships among celebrities and their fans. Social media provides a platform for celebrities to directly communicate with their fans, and, in a way, let their fans into their lives. This can be a good thing. They are able to make more content and interact with their fans. However, the issue arises when fans start to think they know the celebrity on a personal level. While social media is much more personal than a talk show, social media still isn’t real life and people get too attached to celebrities. This leads to fans being massively disappointed or upset with someone when they do something they don’t like. 

A parasocial relationship is best defined as a one-way relationship. One person feels like they know someone, in this case a celebrity, but that celebrity doesn’t know this person exists. On a surface level these aren’t bad; everyone has them. It becomes an issue when these relationships become extreme and toxic. Fans start to feel like they genuinely know the real person behind the celebrity. 

A great example of this is what has been happening with John Mulaney over the past year or two. Mulaney is a very successful comedian with a huge fan base. In December of 2020, Mulaney checked into a drug rehab program for his substance abuse. Coming out of this it was reported that he and his wife of seven years were divorcing. Soon after this it was rumored that him and actress Olivia Munn were in a relationship. In September, Mulaney announced that he and Munn were expecting a child together. The two had their child in December. 

This did not sit well with a lot of Mulaney’s fans. They were speculating that he cheated on his previous wife with Munn. However, there is no evidence that he cheated on his ex-wife. We don’t know the timeline of the divorce and likely will never know. These fans felt like they knew Mulaney because they watched his stand-up specials and followed him on social media, but ultimately only knew his public persona. These fans are upset because a person they thought they knew may have done something they don’t like. 

Like everyone else I am not immune to having these parasocial relationships that may go too far. I have had celebrities that I liked and followed and was disappointed and shocked when it turned out they weren’t good people. However, I didn’t post anything about it. I just unfollowed them and moved on with my life. I was able to take a step back and realize that I didn’t know that person, and the person that I saw on screen wasn’t the real person. 

That is what you have to do if you find yourself developing one of these toxic parasocial relationships with a celebrity. You have to be able to take a step back and realize you don’t know this person 

Mark Warren can be reached at [email protected] or on Twitter @MarkWarren1832   

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