I know — we have all heard about the importance of self-care and mental health a million times. Still, saying it one more time is worth it, especially if you are saying it to a friend.
Self-care has become the mantra for millions of people and a lot of college students like me. Most of my New Year’s resolutions are based around self-care and healthy habits. I know it’s awfully stereotypical of me, but if stupid goals and blind optimism can help me at all, I’ll take it. But when I created these great goals for myself I forgot something — the people I love.
So, I am adding a new resolution. One focused on the care of others and one which pushes me to be a better person, daughter, sister and friend.
This year, I am going to embrace empathy in order to build healthier relationships with those around me.
Empathy is the cornerstone of any relationship for a very simple reason: most people, like myself, crave understanding and affirmation from other people. Without empathy, it is harder to understand or affirm those around you.
Empathy not only connects us to other people, but it connects us to ourselves. We can learn a lot about our own emotions by learning and being conscious of the emotions of others. When we lack empathy for other people, we also lack empathy for ourselves.
I’m going to start implementing my resolution with the best tool I have: the communication and the language I choose to use.
In today’s culture, I see a lot of language surrounding self-care. I also see a lot of languages promoting what I view as a lack of empathy for others. I constantly see posts which encourage people to ignore the feelings of others for the sake of their own wants and needs.
It’s important to put yourself first in this world, but it’s also important to consider the feelings of those you love. Because without that connection, you will suffer. And then your attempt to put yourself first will backfire in the most glaringly obvious way.
Language surrounding self-care is no doubt important, but so is language which promotes healthy communication and empathy for others. Too many times I’ve read posts that are selfish and tell others not to feel or take others’ emotion into account. It is frustrating these selfish posts hide behind the mantra of self-care.
From now on, I’m going to embrace my empathetic nature instead of trying to quash it. I’m going to use my empathy and understanding of others to create healthier relationships with other people. And in turn, I’m hoping to create a healthier relationship with myself.
Elizabeth Marshall can be reached at [email protected] or on Twitter @EJMarshall