Curious George strikes back

Despite an incredibly slow start, ‘Rampage’ finishes strong

In the original 1933 “King Kong,” the 25-foot-tall gorilla is referred to as the eighth wonder of the world. While Kong’s held that title for the last 85 years, it’s time for him to step aside. There’s a new, albino gorilla rampaging through town, and his name is George. Not only does George use sign language, but he’s ‘best’ friends with primatologist Davis Okoye, played by Dwayne Johnson. Or at least as good of a friend as a gorilla can be.

The entire film stands on relatively flimsy ground, assuming you’ll believe the great lengths Okoye goes to in order to save his gorilla friend.

When canisters fall to earth containing gene manipulation pathogens, a wolf (Ralph), a crocodile (Lizzie) and George are exposed. Each animal’s genes are ‘rewritten,’ causing them to become more aggressive and grow much larger in size.

So why were only three animals in the entire world affected? It’s a good question, but ultimately the film doesn’t provide a good answer.

To be fair, this plot isn’t exactly grounded in reality. The film is loosely based off of the 1986 video game of the same name, where you could cause havoc as Ralph, Lizzie and George. But in the game, each animal was formerly human. Upon taking enough damage, you would turn back into your human form and lose your current score.

I was disappointed that George was not originally a human in the film. I was much more disappointed when he remained a gorilla at the end, even after taking some heavy hits.

But what hurts most of all is my wish not coming true of seeing a 50-foot-tall Dwayne Johnson. I’m sure it’ll happen at some point — a man can dream.

Watching this film is an almost surreal experience. Budget King Kong fights budget Godzilla, and yet it’s more enjoyable than the other two.

At this point I’m beginning to suspect Johnson has actual superpowers, since he has the uncanny ability to make any movie he’s in much more enjoyable.

Johnson, and in this case George as well, have a natural charisma that adds to the film’s charm.

The problem is that even if something is enjoyable, it doesn’t necessarily mean it’s good.

Make no mistake, the Johnson-George combo is not a reflection of the movie as a whole. For every positive George-ism (if that’s not a word, it really should be), there’s a scene that leaves you scratching your head.

I applaud the film for finding a way to be surprisingly boring throughout the first two acts, because it shouldn’t be possible with this source material.

These acts seem to drag on, with very little plot development or action. Because of the usual spoiler-filled trailers, the audience knows it’s only a matter of time until the other two animals show up, but it becomes a waiting game.

Okoye teams up with Dr. Kate Caldwell, played by Naomie Harris, who has knowledge of the pathogen and also wants to find the cure. Together, they accomplish very little, at least until they get to Chicago.

The third act is the film’s savior, the product of mass amounts of CGI and Transformers inspiration. While it’s hectic and a bit nonsensical, it was actually surprisingly fun to watch.

Chicago is beaten up in spectacular fashion, and you can’t help but smile while watching Johnson stand underneath a monstrously tall gorilla.

“Rampage” isn’t meant to be taken seriously. But it seems like the actors realized this, and decided to roll with the punches.

It won’t be winning any Academy Awards, yet it’s still a more entertaining film than the last few I’ve reviewed, and George is a pretty great gorilla.

It’s fitting to end with a quote from Harvey Russell, a government agent played by Jeffrey Dean Morgan.

“When science shits the bed, I’m the one they call to change the sheets.”

What does that mean? I’ve seen the film, and I’m still not exactly sure. It’s up to you to decide.

Max Rothenberg can be reached at [email protected]

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