| 03.18.2018

Ch-ch-changes — Change can be constructive when you utilize it positively


In early December, I was oblivious to the life twist that was coming my direction before winter break. Out of the blue, my parents called me and told me they were divorcing.

I didn’t know what to think at the time — I was in complete shock. I was confused, scared and I felt more alone than ever. It is still hard to grasp.

I kept thinking to myself, “What if I did something wrong? How can I fix this?”

Lindsay Trombly | Argonaut

The fact was, I didn’t do anything wrong. There’s no way of getting my parents back together.

Even though I’m just a sophomore in college, divorce is hard for all ages to cope with.

There’s never good timing for this sort of news, but I’m grateful to have a supportive brother, my best friend and my parents helping me along the way. After a few days of having the news sink in, I was ready to travel home and be there for my family.

Going home for winter break was difficult seeing my parents live in different places and coming home to an empty house. Looking around my house, I was constantly reminded of the past through memories, pictures and videos of how my family used to be.

Once I thought about it, I’ve been going through changes my whole life — we all do. Sometimes these changes are small, and sometimes they end up being life-altering.

This was a good lesson in how the lives of others can affect the people around you. This is my parents’ change and their choice, but they know how it affects me. Ultimately, my parents have been happier separated and it has created a more stress-free environment.

Since returning to school, I have dived into work and classes. Working for The Argonaut and Blot and juggling a course load is stressful at times, but I understand why I do it all now. It keeps my mind busy from the changes that are occurring in my life — the changes going on at home and the little changes that occur every day.

Changes are inevitable throughout our lifetime. The changes that I’ve been going through these past two months have been difficult, but they needed to happen.

Changes can be a terrible thing to deal with, but in this case it will all work out. I’d rather my parents break up instead of being unhappy for the rest of their lives. I know they just want me to be happy and I want the same for them. They both deserve it.

If you are going through a change in your life that has affected you in a dramatic way, just know there are healthy ways to cope. Talk to your friends and family, and if that doesn’t help, visit with a professional. Keep doing things you love, and don’t stop being you. Stay a comfortable busy, but at the same time, don’t lose yourself.

As humans, we are always going through change. Just know that you’re not alone and you can get through it.

Lindsay Trombly can be reached at arg-opinion@uidaho.edu or on Twitter @lindsay_trombly

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