| 03.24.2018

Ode to the Breakfast Burrito

It’s basically bacon in an envelope

Cy Whitling | Crumbs

Cy Whitling | Crumbs

Cy Whitling | Crumbs

In a world teaming with breakfast options, it is easy to get sucked into the maelstrom of choices and let the exceptional options slip by.

Today I would like to direct attention to the humble breakfast burrito.

This dish is sometimes overlooked in the crowd of omelets, pancakes, waffles and crepes that often dominate our morning cuisine. This is an atrocity that must be rectified.

Cy Whitling

Cy Whitling | Crumbs

The breakfast burrito has several attributes that make it a top contender for the coveted title of “Best Breakfast.” The most obvious is its nutritional value, followed closely by its portability and ease of manufacture.

Let me set the scene.

On morning three of a six-day ski trip, five people are stuffed in one small room. Ski socks and apparel are strewn across the carpet. The floor is a mass of sleeping bags, gear bags, camera bags, lunch bags and ski bums. Walking across the room isn’t so much a matter of trying to find the carpet as it is a matter of not stepping on the people as you go.

I arise, awakened by the chorus of snores coming from throughout the room. I’m sore, battered, weary and ready to stay laying there forever, massaging my aching cramps.

Instead, I follow the sound of crackling of bacon to the kitchen. There, with minimal effort I construct a breakfast burrito. There are no ovens to pre-heat, no batters to mix. In fact, you can cook the bacon in the microwave while scrambling the eggs and frying the potatoes. Even for a kitchen novice like myself, this is an  attainable task.

Once prepared, these simple ingredients combine to create a menu item with almost incomprehensible value. No one would expect such humble inputs to produce such a majestic food. Breakfast burritos are packed with flavor, protein, fats and all those other important nutritional things people are supposed to put into their bodies. The problem with most nutritional foods is that they either taste bad or they are impossible to eat on the go.

The breakfast burrito solves both these problems. It tastes great, especially if there is a lot of salsa and guacamole on it.

Where it truly shines though is its portability. Just wrap it up tight and you can eat it on the road, in the lift line or on the mountain.

Tired of putting on cold boots in the morning? Just make a few extra breakfast burritos, wrap them in foil and stick them in a Ziploc bag. Before you head out, stick the steaming burritos in your boots. They’ll warm up your feet and keep the burritos insulated. Just don’t forget the Ziploc bag, otherwise your boots might end up smelling like bacon and your burrito might be a little footy.

The breakfast burrito is clearly a morning food option like no other. Its only competitor for nutritional value, ease of manufacture and portability might be my special Raisin Bran mix, but that’s a different story for a different column.

Cy Whitling can be reached at arg-arts@uidaho.edu

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