Religion has been known to cause rifts — that’s no secret. People disagree on what values should be most important, what acts are sinful and where we go after we die.
Most all of us have probably engaged in a conversation that has caused us to explore another perspective, defend our own and discover similarities and differences. It’s nearly impossible for everyone in the world, country, state, county or city to agree on what values should be held most important, and yes, in many cases these disagreements are the deciding factor in people’s ability to get along.
But it’s not the only factor.
There are more people than not who are friends with others who have slightly different values and morals, and for some people those do derive from religion. What seems to be neglected when religion enters a conversation about morals and values is that people also have an innate tendency to care about others. Whether religious beliefs or childhood lessons emphasize the Golden Rule, it is a value many people share.
This basic moral outlook makes it possible for people to be friends — even best friends regardless of differing religious beliefs. My best friend is Mormon, and it is incredibly annoying to be asked how that is possible or how it works since I’m not. It works like any other friendship. She is one of the most caring people I have ever met, and I know that at the end of the day no matter what happens she will be there for me. And I am there for her.
There has never been a point in our friendship at which either of us has pressured the other to convert to “our way of thinking.” We talk openly about our values (many of which are the same), life goals, what’s happening in our lives — the good and the bad — and give each other advice about it all. We don’t judge, we’re just friends and have been for eight years.
Friendship does not develop because two people are of the same religion. It develops because two people share the same values regardless of how they came to have them. It lasts because no matter where life takes them, or who asks dumb questions, they are there for each other no matter what.