Sex is not black and white. There are countless nuances and variations involved in sex, and that is one of the reasons sex is fun. There are few activities in life where if you can imagine it, you can do it. Just as unique as humans are sexual fetishes.
Sexual fetishes are completely normal and healthy. Now, when a lot of people think about a sexual fetish, what comes to mind is an automatic mental image of a dark, stone dungeon filled with people in leather brandishing whips and chains. While that is indeed a fetish, it is not necessarily what I am talking about. It is a healthy form of expression when following the motto of “safe, sane and consensual.” A fetish can be something simple and commonplace that inspires sexual desire.

Lingerie is a staple fetish for many. The visual eroticism of your partner in such attire, knowing that it is done for you, can be quite titillating. Mix that with the knowledge the time spent on preparation (buying the lingerie, getting dressed and making oneself as attractive as possible) is again to inspire sexual desire, and you have not only a delightful situation, but also a basic sexual fetish. Keep in mind this is not a one-way street, and your partner may want to see you in equally erotic attire.

Many individuals love feathers and blindfolds. These fetishes are unintimidating and actively involve all individuals.
The sensory deprivation of having sight removed heightens the sense of touch. When that is combined with the erotic stimulation of a feather (much different than a hand or tongue), it culminates in a new and exciting situation. This can be further altered by introducing various temperatures.
Use of an ice cube or hot wax (do not use beeswax unless you want third degree burns — try a soy wax instead) provides different sensations while still being completely safe and modest compared to some fetishes.
Do not overlook the sense of smell. Wearing your partner’s favorite aroma can bring forth pleasurable memories of times you have spent together and produce sexual excitement. This is a powerful sense for many people, and it is not something requiring a lot of work to produce.
Along the same lines are different auditory stimulations. Sometimes sounds heard during the throes of passion elicit increased stimulation and excitement. Those sounds should not be forgotten and should be utilized at the appropriate times.

Many people enjoy and are excited by the notion of enjoying sexual activities outside. The bedroom can become very monotonous. Adding some variation in location can rekindle the sexual fire for each other.
Some basic courtesy suggests if you have roommates, you do not have sex on the dining table or kitchen counters. These are shared surfaces, and it has the potential of really upsetting those you live with.

However, that does not mean you should not try having sex in the shower or even outdoors. Be mindful of indecent exposure laws as well as weather conditions. You could go camping and enjoy the sensuality of being intimate in the wilderness near a campfire. Cuddle with each other in the tent while the sounds of nature encourage you to enjoy the passion you are experiencing.
These are just some ideas. What is important to remember is a fetish does not have to be extreme or difficult. To experience a fetish all you need is your imagination (and sometimes props).

Fetishes are simple and a delightful way to explore and further experience your human sexuality. Experiment with them, and do not tell yourself that a fetish is stupid. Chances are if you find something erotic and stimulating, many people in the world have the same fetish.

Have fun, be safe and play with your fetishes.
Have a question for Chris? Send it to This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it

Only registered users can write comments.
Please login or register.