The other evening I watched what can be considered a socially normal form of mating. Individuals were gathered together to mingle with one another. Flirtation occurred in various forms, from simple conversation to more intimate actions drawing interested parties to one another. Another component involved in more than moderation was the consumption of alcohol.

As I watched I was filled with many thoughts as to the connection between sexual desire, sexual activity and drinking.
I am not going to say, “never drink.” Many people drink for many different reasons (few of those reasons being any good). For many of you, it is a well-known fact that I never advocate mixing alcohol and sexual activity. I feel compelled to further explore this combination because your safety is compromised the most.

Leaving a party with someone you barely know is not a great decision. By doing so you are allowing yourself to go to an unknown location with an unknown individual. There are so many problems with personal safety in that scenario it is not even remotely humorous. Instead, if you feel so motivated to see this individual again, provide your phone number. While it may not be as much fun for you to wait, knowing where you are (especially in relationship to where you live) is more important than 15 minutes of fun. Knowing the other person’s name is not only safer but better social etiquette.

Another safety aspect involves protection. It is also a well-known fact I love condoms. High intoxication levels convince individuals condoms are not necessary. That is wrong. Condoms are always necessary. I reiterate this from last week because it is important to note that drunk logic (telling you that condoms are frivolous) fails in comparison to sober logic (reminding you of personal safety and health).

Sex should be enjoyed and remembered. Waking up the next morning in a strange bed unable to remember what you did the night before is not a sign of a good time. If you are going to go through the motions of having sex, you should remember it because if you do not, you wasted your time and put yourself at great risk (and most likely made bad decisions). Not to mention the fact sensation was most likely decreased if not completely void.
One of the side effects of being drunk is a person does not have the same level of sensation. If you are too drunk to feel anything happening to your body, that is a sign you should not be having sex.

Most important is the matter of consent. Sex must be consensual for all individuals involved. Furthermore, it should involve informed consent (all parties know what will happen and agree to those activities). Intoxicated consent is not informed consent.
Rather, it is miscomprehended, confused, illogical and uninformed “consent” (it is more like unknowing compliance). The chances of being hurt and put into a compromising situation (involving but not limited to physical safety and health and wellness safety) are increased.

Most people know that drinking and driving do not mix. Why would drinking and sex be any different? The same side from the alcohol exists, and the risk is about the same (instead of possible immediate death from a car accident, you can get a STI to last the rest of your life).

Decide before you go out if you are going to get drunk or going to have sex.
Have fun, be safe and do not drink and have sex.
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