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As I am sure many of you are aware, we are coming up on the most romantic date of the year. That is correct—Valentine’s Day is quickly approaching. Everyone likes to celebrate this holiday differently and that is completely acceptable. Some will take their sweethearts to dinner, while others will prepare a romantic home-cooked meal. Whatever plans you make this year, I suggest thinking outside of the conventional box with some suggestions.
First of all, chocolate is over. While giving your sweetheart a box of chocolates may have been considered romantic once upon a time, in today’s time, people want a little bit more. If you are just dead set on giving some sort of snack/indulgence food as a gift for Valentine’s Day, why not get something that your sweetheart loves but rarely buys. You may even want to try a “goodie basket.” You can compile various snacks and treats you know your other half will enjoy instead of sticking to just one sweet.
Secondly, be careful when purchasing certain gifts. This is especially true when buying a “traditional” gift for women. The simple fact of the matter is that buying lingerie for another person is dangerous. If you are going to take this route, be extra sure you know her size. If you buy something too small or too big, you are going to regret that decision. You will also face a problem if you buy something that she finds aesthetically unpleasant. I suggest taking her to the store with you. Have her pick out multiple lingerie pieces that she likes and encourage her to try them on to make sure they fit. Do not buy anything at the time but return later without her and pick one of the pieces she likes. That way you know you are making a good choice but it is still a bit of a surprise for her when she gets it.
I do not suggest buying shoes for a woman unless she is with you or you are positive you are making a good decision. This is very much like the lingerie issue … but can be a little bit worse. Enough said.
On the other end, do not assume men do not care about romance. While it is true that some men really could care less, there are a lot of men who enjoy and appreciate romance.
You need to put in just as much effort to impress your guy as you expect him to put in to impress you. Part of being in a relationship is about doing things for your partner … Valentine’s Day is no exception. You might have to be a little more creative, perhaps he would really enjoy seeing you in a football jersey for example, but he will appreciate and respond well to the effort.
Do something special that you both enjoy that night that does not center on sex. I realize it seems odd that I am advocating the avoidance of sex; however, there is reasoning behind this.
Valentine’s Day is about spending time with your significant other. It is about being romantic and intimate and celebrating your status of being together. While sex can be a part of that, it should not be the entirety. Be intimate with embraces and closeness. Enjoy sensual candlelight and massages (there are even candles you can use for massage lotion). Find activities that provide intimacy without involving sex. Yes, sex may happen and that is great; however, if it does not happen, it is not the end of the world. Caressing your blindfolded partner’s body with a rose can be just as intimate and rewarding, if not more so, than sex.
Now, not being in a relationship does not mean you can’t enjoy Valentine’s Day. Perhaps this is a perfect opportunity for you to ask a crush out on a date. You might want to have an anti-Valentine’s Day party with some of your close friends. You may want to ignore the day entirely. I suggest finding something you really want to do or have and letting it happen. Be happy on this day, treat yourself to a romantic evening (you can go out to dinner or enjoy candles and a bubble bath or whatever you would like). Just because no one has been lucky enough to snag you for this holiday does not mean you should not enjoy it.
Have fun, be safe and be outside the box.
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Chris Bidiman is a junior studying School and Community Health and a Safer Sex Outreach speaker.
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